Report: Twilight New Moon Fan Party
The lucky buggers outside actually got close and they didn't have to win a thing. We got an interview that we could barely hear and tinnitus.
I am a vampire geek. The glorious undead have occupied a section of my heart since childhood; from Count Von Count on Sesame Street, Bela Lugosi hamming it up in Universal's seminal Dracula, through to Hammer's many vampire entries and Anne Rice's soapy Lestat novels, I am unashamedly Team Vampire. Which brings me to Stephenie Meyer's Twilight Saga. Four books written for "young adults" about an ordinary teenage girl, Bella Swan, who falls in love with the ridiculously dashing and perfect Edward Cullen who is... dun dun dun... a vampire! Be still my beating heart. Here we find a somewhat sanitised, wholesome vision of bloodsuckers. Edward and his family are all "vegetarians", feeding only on the blood of animals, and there's no sex before marriage. Vampire lore is jiggled and poked to allow Meyer's creations to walk about in daylight and you know what? Even for a geek like me this is actually fine and dandy. I keep hearing vamp fans moan and hate on this series of books and the tweaking of the well-known laws. Vampires should die in sunlight, they need to be invited into your house, they're sexual beings, blah blah blah. I love all these things, but in the world of fiction are we not permitted to use our imaginations and re-invent? Grow up haters! The vampires of the Twilight world are every bit as compelling as Lestat, Spike, Dracula, Bill, Eric and, um, David Bowie. This is romance. Heart-tearing, hair-pulling Romeo and Juliet style romance, and boy do I love the misery.
You'd have to have spent the past twelve months living in the jungles of Borneo to not have heard the name Robert Pattinson (or RPattz as he's known in these here parts), the young Brit actor who plays Edward Cullen in the film version of Twilight, and its sequel New Moon. Wow, the cheekbones, the gravity defying hair - damn he is a dreamy bugger. That's just what the hundreds of girls chanting his name outside Battersea Evolution think too on this cold November night in London. We're here to witness not a film premiere but an exclusive fan party held by the films UK distributors E1 Entertainment to placate the British fans rightly disappointed at the lack of a UK premiere. Some have been waiting outside the entrance of Battersea Park since the previous night and they're not even going in to the party. They're here to line the red carpet, catch a glimpse of Edward, Bella and Jacob, the wolf to Edward's vamp and the third point in a deliciously wrought love triangle. I am one of the lucky ones to have had my name drawn out from a ballot of thousands to attend the party, ostensibly a gig featuring bands from the soundtrack of New Moon, with a 40 minute Q&A session featuring Pattinson, Kristen Stewart (Bella Swan), Taylor Lautner (Jacob Black) and director Chris Weitz. After one of the most pointlessly long and arduous queues I've ever had the displeasure to wait in (outside, in the cold and dark being rained on for several hours) we are given our wristbands and directed in. It's all rather impressive, a giant light balloon is suspended in the air to give the impression of a full moon and with the park's many trees serving as a backdrop the scene is particularly dramatic. My friends and I are asked to walk down the red carpet, a sea of excited and cold looking faces stare at us, banners with Team Edward and Team Jacob adorn the barriers and the night air is thick with oestrogen. I start to fear for the two male stars after surveying the somewhat hungry looks from the fans. If there are vampires here tonight they are the ones behind the barriers chanting and screaming for their respective "teams" and they want more than blood. Good luck boys.
The main hall is adorned with huge cinema banners of the film, dramatic lighting setting them off nicely. Several large screens will provide those at the back with a good view of the action on stage and the soundtrack is playing on repeat - it's all serving to whip these girls into near frenzy at the thought that soon they will lay eyes on their heroes. Making our way down closer to the stage we amuse ourselves by playing "spot the parent" as so many are clearly here to escort their little darlings. Poor parents, I may be old but I'm a fan so I can (just about) handle the impending scream-a-thon. They have no idea...
An hour before the first band are due onstage and the screens are suddenly alive with the vaguely entertaining Alex Zane. The start of the screaming inside the venue begins and I have to cover my ears, no lie. Zane is on the red carpet and in preparation for the stars' arrival is interviewing the blood thirsty hordes outside. He asks one girl what it is about the Twilight Saga that makes it so different and appealing. "Edward Cullen," she replies to hoots of approval from the majority. Clearly not the answer he was looking for, Zane repeats the question to another girl. Her answer? "Edward Cullen". Yeah thanks love, way to silence the haters. It's becoming clear to me that the real problem the vampire snobs have with Meyer's winsome characters are the fans themselves. Most are articulate, intelligent types, in love with a beautiful and sweet love story - the elements of danger and the forbidden are thrown in to set the heart beating faster - and then there are the ones that just fancy the cast. It's all gravy though, who am I to judge? For all my pontificating I fancy about half the male cast too.
The action outside is appearing to be far more interesting than that inside, actors dressed as the Volturi (something akin to vampire mafia) are stalking about looking menacing, agile, gymnastic topless men are back flipping all over the place, mimicking the wolf pack from the film, and the fans inside are getting a little envious of the high jinks. As the first car pulls up on the carpet the screams are deafening. Robert Pattinson peels out looking more than a little designer dishevelled and it rather delights me to see he still looks a little ill at ease with the hysteria. Keep that attitude and you'll hang on to your sanity sunshine. Signing autographs and genially chatting to the fans the envy levels hit Def Con One inside. We continue to witness the red carpet goings on for a little while seeing both Stewart and Lautner arrive, although curiously director Weitz appears to be ignored by haircut boy Zane. We soon discover why as he's been rushed into the venue to introduce the first band with Radio One DJ Nick Grimshaw. Cue screams of "we love you Chris", from the audience and Band Of Skulls take to the stage for four songs. With an impressively scuzzy bass sound akin to Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, their slightly dirty rock is easy on the palate. Any other time I'd be happy to enjoy a full set but with aching feet and ringing ears, not to mention the irritating girl next to me who thinks my shoulders are a tripod for her to take pictures on and is all elbows and wriggling in an attempt to get closer, I am anxious for things to get moving.
Magic Numbers are next and are as endearing and sweet as ever but you know what? I have date with a vampire and wolf and I need that date to happen now! The crowd join in with an impromptu sing a long but they're getting restless to see what they came here for. Grimshaw is back and although I generally find him grating he is quite amusing tonight and seems genuinely pleased to be here. Introducing the cast and director to the stage the screams exceed all previous decibel levels and the floor shakes beneath our feet. Annoying elbow girl has a scream to curdle the blood while I feel like spilling hers. The young stars don't look surprised but they do look utterly bemused. Grimshaw attempts to read out the fan submitted questions and the four attempt to answer. It becomes clear that some in the audience simply want to shout and scream their love, not giving the guests a fair chance to answer, Pattinson shaking his head a little and giggling at the absurdity of the occasion. I'm torn between wanting to leap on stage and ravage him and the desire to pet his head and mumble "there, there Pattz, everything will be ok" into his nest of hair. I'm leaning more towards the latter. Lautner, at 17, seems a level-headed chap, although on occasion he looks a little uncomfortable with all the declarations of love yelled at him when he tries to answer questions. If they loved him so much surely they'd want to hear what he had to say? At one point Weitz, seemingly exasperated at the cacophony of noise, declares that he should just cut his answer short: "no one wants to hear what I have to say anyway". We do Chris! In fact most of the fans here are interested in what he has to say and you can hear some of them sigh in despair that they are being lumped in with the selfish screamers. Stewart, in stark contrast to her slightly nervy, overwhelmed appearance at last year's premiere, is confident and charming. Answering the questions in good humour she wins over the audience by defending them when poor Grimshaw attempts to quieten them. Ah Kristen, I think I have a non-sexual girl crush on you, please be my bff.
As the Q&A session is wrapped up and the stars wave their goodbyes, a feeling of anti-climax decends upon the throng of fans. Is that it? Didn't RPattz spot me in the crowd? Couldn't he smell my blood or hear my thoughts? No, the lucky buggers outside actually got close and they didn't have to win a thing. We got an interview that we could barely hear and tinnitus. Still, we have the film to see in just over a week and hey there's always next year for a meeting with Edward and co right? Eclipse is released in summer 2010 and Breaking Dawn is sure to follow shortly after. So with a farewell to the admittedly lovely banners decorating the auditorium we, along with a good portion of the fans, exit the building before the end of the party, ten minutes of preview footage not tempting enough when our feet hurt, our ears ache and we know there's a good chance we won't be able to hear a bloody word said on screen.
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